Hello you lot 😷

Well the way it’s going, all those people who have Covid-19 will have to go and live on the moon😳

I feel sorry for Leicester, empty shops smelling of curry! 😲 The only trouble is, in 1998 it was still 1970 in Leicester! πŸ€ͺ Just ask Showaddywaddy! A great band & lovely people, the people in the town will always speak to you, I’ve been there a thousand times, I love it there πŸ‘πŸΌ

I once got a taxi πŸš• he said β€œthat’s 8 quid mate” I said β€œf**k that! I was hitchhiking ya C**t 😲

I’ve been to China πŸ‡¨πŸ‡³ now.. anyone who eats ducks feet, monkeys brains 🧠 lizards 🦎 & bats can’t be a full shilling 🀨 either that or they’ve been on Ant & Dec’s show! 🀣

Well according to the science Covid is coming downπŸ€” I think the powers that be treat us like a drunk treats a lamp post, they are pissing on us! 😬

There is a gene in liars! All politicians have got it πŸ˜‚

If Boris had written the Ten Commandments, he’d have f**king changed four of them πŸ€¨πŸ‘

You are either lucky or you are not 😏 I’m so unlucky, I stood at the carousel in the airport waiting for my big red case, I was still there when everyone had gone home! Some f**ker had painted it green🀨 Always expect the unexpected! Do you think Houdini was in that coffin βš°οΈπŸ€”

That Gertrude Cummins (you know who I mean) said she’d like to marry an alienπŸ™„ well she already looks like one! πŸ˜‚ Watching her on tv πŸ“Ί is like staring at a cows arse for days 😬 It’s no wonder Weightwatchers are suing herπŸ˜‚ She’s everywhere at the moment, she’d turn up at a Beatles reunion! What a f**king diva πŸ‘©β€πŸŽ€ I bet she finds it difficult to have an orgasm without getting out of breath πŸ€ͺ She’d struggle taking a toffee paper off πŸ˜‚ I’d sooner have constipation than f**k her πŸ₯΅

Have a good weekend, I’ll text again soon, I love you all

Everyone Stay Safe